Category: Heather Brody (page 3 of 5)

Let’s Play Some Dominoes – Part 2

“Every action in our lives touches on some chord that will vibrate in eternity.” ~Edwin Hubbel Chapin

Toward the end of last semester, I wrote about my experience volunteering with my service fraternity, Alpha Phi Omega, at The Friendship House’s Saturday Morning Sanctuary. This experience really made me think about community service and why it is important to help those in need. I felt like a changed person afterward. This past Saturday, I was able to volunteer at Saturday Morning Sanctuary once more, and those feelings were strengthened from the experience.

I entered the same church with my group, wondering if I would see the man I talked to last time, Peter, again. Part of me did not want him to be there; I was hoping that over the winter his situation improved and that he did not need to come to the sanctuary any longer. The other part of me, however, wanted to see him once more. I told him that I would come back, and I wanted to keep that promise.

As we began to hand out cups, sugar, and hot chocolate packets, I noticed a man walking over who looked very familiar. I wasn’t sure why at first, but then I realized who it was – Peter. His hair was shorter than the last time I saw him, but other than that he looked the same. We introduced ourselves and he told me that I looked familiar. I reminded him of the time I came last semester, and he remembered in an instant who I was and what we had talked about! I ended up sitting with him for a little to catch up. We talked about politics, traveling, our families, anything that we could think of! He was the same kind, intelligent person who I had met before.

Later on, I noticed a man sitting in the corner of the room carving what looked like the face of a lion into a long wooden walking stick. Bill, the man in charge of the sanctuary, asked the carving man, Marshall, to show us his other pieces, and he ran out of the room only to come pack with two large bags filled with more walking sticks. He pulled them out one by one, showing us the intricate carvings that he had made into the wood; each had its own story. He used techniques, like burning the wood, to shade the sticks, and he planned on eventually using paint to color them and personalize them for potential clients. He wasn’t doing it for money, though; he was doing it because he loved it. It was a way for him to escape for a little bit and do something that made him happy. And, boy, was he good at it! They were beautiful! I wanted to buy one right then and there, but, alas, I am a broke college kid.

After hearing Marshall’s spiel, we went back to handing out cups and sugar. I noticed that each person who came up to us was so kind and friendly. They all wanted to have conversations with us, even if they were only a few sentences long. The experience really reinforced what I had learned last time – that the stigmas behind homelessness simply aren’t true. Not having a stable living situation does not make you any less of a human; it just makes you more vulnerable. That is why it was so important that we volunteered there; it gave these people a chance to focus on something other than their lifestyle for a few hours and have meaningful, friendly conversations with another person.

I like to think that some day homelessness will no longer be a problem in our society, but I may be too optimistic. In the meantime, I can continue to volunteer my time to these people and do my best to get them to where they want to be in life. I know that what I did may not seem like much, but even the smallest action can make a huge difference in someone’s life.

~Heather Brody

Let’s Play Some Dominoes

Recently I volunteered with the Friendship House of Delaware at their “Saturday Morning Sanctuary” and I don’t think I will ever forget my experience. I didn’t know what to expect going into it. We entered a church in Wilmington at 8:00 in the morning to find homeless people sitting at tables, playing games and talking to each other. Some of them wouldn’t take their eyes off us. Bill, the man in charge of the event, told us that the Friendship House was an organization dedicated to helping the homeless. Every winter, they open up churches to let homeless people in to have a warm, safe place to stay on Saturday mornings. Pretty much everything was donated: coffee, tea, hot chocolate, pastries, hats, gloves, and board games. Our job as volunteers was to simply talk to the people who were staying in the church for the morning and make them feel like they are being treated like “human beings,” as Bill said. It made me a bit uncomfortable to hear him say those things right in front of all of the homeless men and women sitting nearby. Could you imagine someone talking about you like that? How must these people feel, knowing that they are not seen as important enough to be treated like human beings by some people?

Bill brought me and the two other volunteers to a few people who he knew were friendly and were comfortable sharing their situations with volunteers. I spoke to a man named Peter for most of my time there. The stereotypes of homeless people are so ridiculous; the idea that they are all just crazy people who were not motivated enough to keep up a stable lifestyle is completely untrue. Peter is one of the smartest people I have ever met. He is always reading and is interested in knowing about current events and what is happening in the world, which is more than I can say about most of my peers at the University of Delaware, honestly. He is passionate about music and about languages and traveling and movies and he even recommended some films that he thought I would enjoy watching. I also met a man named Michael who was one of the friendliest people I have ever met. He walked over to me and asked if I wanted to play dominoes with him, and we played game after game. He always had a smile on his face and a joke to tell.

I feel like people wouldn’t expect these things from a homeless person. So they don’t have a home. Why should that take away a person’s intelligence, kindness, dignity, or their humanity? Some of these people have dealt with horrible things – depression, suicide attempts, incarceration, divorce – and I think it is disgusting to look down upon them for their economic situations.

At around 11:00, Bill announced that the church would be closing and that everyone would have to leave. I said goodbye to my new friends, and was filled with sadness as they left. Where will they go now? What is going to happen to them? It was so cold outside and while I had the comfort of knowing in the back of my mind that I would end up in my warm on-campus dorm, these people did not have that privilege. It makes me so angry to think about how unfair it is that some people in this country have millions of dollars just sitting in their bank accounts, while other people are out on the streets with just a backpack to hold all of their belongings. We live in such a cruel world. But all I know is that I made a difference to Peter and Michael for one morning. I offered them a smile and some friendly interaction, something that Bill said they do not usually have due to their living situations. I gave them a few hours in which they could forget about their own lives and just have a friend that they could play with and talk to. Something as simple as that can truly mean a lot to someone.

I plan on volunteering with the Friendship House more often at their “Saturday Morning Sanctuary” events and I hope that I have convinced other readers to help out as well. Especially during this time of year, it is important to give back and to be thankful for what you have because you never know when you may lose it all.

Heather, Bill, and two other volunteers inside the church.

Heather, Bill, and two other volunteers inside the church.

The list of movies that Peter gave to Heather.

The list of movies that Peter gave to Heather.

~Heather Brody

Slut-Shaming Celebrities

I have never been much of a Taylor Swift fan. This was partially because I was never a big fan of country music in general. Another reason was that her songs tended to have a clear theme: relationships. Swift has been criticized throughout her career as a country artist for dating tons of guys and then writing songs about them once their relationship is over. This used to bother me. However, I now see how wrong I was to judge her. It is her life, and she should be able to date whomever she wants without criticism. Why should it matter how many men she has dated or whether she writes her songs about them? She has the right to express her feelings through her art and to explore her sexuality without public scrutiny.

Along with this epiphany came the realization that women get criticized more than men do for their dating life. When a male celebrity goes on dates with different girls, no one seems to notice. It is just accepted as the norm. However, when a female celebrity does the same, her face is in all the magazines and people are appalled at her involvement in the dating scene. Why should men be able to explore their sexuality, while women can’t? Why should Miley Cyrus be ostracized for her famous 2013 VMA performance of “Blurred Lines,” while Robin Thicke isn’t? He took part in the over-sexualized performance as much as she did; it takes two to tango! And he is the one who wrote the song “Blurred Lines,” which includes language that supports rape culture in our society. Shouldn’t he be the one that people think is crazy, not Miley?

I think that society is still so obsessed with the idea that women are supposed to be pure and innocent, that they forget how restricting this is on women. People hold us to such a high standard, and if we do one little thing that may conflict with this view, we are immediately called demeaning names and looked down on by society. Now, I’m not saying that everyone holds women to these standards or treats them so horribly. Of course there are plenty of kind, sane people in this world! However, I do think that a good portion of society just can’t let go of the perfect housewife, Virgin Mary image of women. Society needs to stop slut-shaming women and start accepting the fact that women are human beings, too.

Breakfast Club

~Heather Brody

Is It Chivalry? Or Equality?

I recently had a conversation with my friend about whether or not chivalry is dead in our society, and I really didn’t know what side to take on the argument. Maybe chivalry is dead and men should make more of an effort to be kind to the women in their lives. But doesn’t that present women as submissive and in need of a man’s help? A woman should not rely on a man to do what she can do for herself; she should be strong and independent. I went back and forth in my mind and finally came to the realization that maybe we are looking at the question from the wrong angle. Maybe instead of seeing chivalry as a man putting his romantic partner first, we should look at it as people simply being nice to each other.

Let me fill you in on my thought process. I have a boyfriend, and I love when he does things for me that are deemed “chivalrous.” This might mean that he holds a door open for me or he gives me his jacket when I am cold, all of those mushy gushy romantic clichés. However, what I appreciate about our relationship is that he doesn’t stop me from doing those same chivalrous actions for him. He can hold a door open for me, and I can hold the next door open for him. To me, it isn’t chivalry. It is being a kind human being. We need to stop looking at chivalry from such a stereotypical viewpoint and instead add some gender equality to it! A woman can be chivalrous; it is not a job reserved for only men.

Our idea of chivalry must change in order to create a better society. If boys are taught as they grow up that women are trophies to hold by their side and take care of, we are just supporting the idea of a male-dominated society. Women constitute half of the world’s population, so we must be treated as equals to men. A society that supports such stereotypical terms also creates a space in which issues such as domestic violence can exist. Think about it – the norm is that men are supposed to take care of women. Therefore, women are seen as submissive and basically the property of a man. If a woman is then seen as the property of a man, he can do whatever he pleases to her without any backfire. The woman then would have no way to reach out for help because the man is seen as “chivalrous” for “taking care of her” and she is his crazy wife/property. Sadly, this is the reality of many people in violent relationships in today’s society.

So, the next time someone asks you what ever happened to chivalry, say that it isn’t dead; it’s called equality. It’s called helping a fellow human being out for a change. It’s called being a nice person. Do not let gender roles and stereotypes prevail in today’s society. It is an issue that affects everyone, and we must work together to put an end to this gender discrimination.

Chivalry-winner

~Heather Brody

A Guide for the Shy Freshman

I have always been a very shy person, so of course I was nervous for my freshman year at UD. I was going to a school in a different state where I didn’t know anyone! Luckily, I had the Honors Program to help me come out of my shell. Here is some advice for the Class of 2018 introverts:

Study in your floor lounge!
If you want to meet people on your floor, but aren’t comfortable enough to knock on their door and strike up a conversation, then you should study in your floor lounge. There will most likely always be another person studying there, so join them! Next thing you know, a new friendship will begin. I did not do this much because I get distracted easily, but I definitely recommend this opportunity for floor bonding!

Go to events planned by your Munson Fellow(s)!
Your Munson Fellow (or fellows if you have more than one like I did) will plan a bunch of events for your floor and for the Honors Program throughout the year. Go to those events! You will have fun and meet a lot of people who share your interests. I remember going on a White Clay Creek hike that was planned by my Munson Fellow and a Munson Fellow from another floor. I had a great time and bonded with people who I am still friends with today!

Join Clubs!
If you don’t find yourself particularly satisfied with the people on your floor, then join clubs that involve your interests! I have made some of my best friends here by joining clubs and forcing myself to talk to people. It really helped me learn to be more outgoing and more of a leader on campus.

So, for all the introverted freshmen out there wondering if they will make friends here at UD, do not worry! You will find your niche on campus, make genuine friendships, and have an amazing time here. I hope you enjoy every minute of your time here because it will go by fast!

~Heather Brody

The trip to White Clay Creek that my Munson Fellow organized last year!

The trip to White Clay Creek that Heather’s Munson Fellow organized last year!

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